I'm pregnant. Shoot me now.

Yeah. I guess I jinxed myself when I kept saying we were done having kids. Turns out Heavenly Father had some different plans for us.
We found out we were pregnant about a month ago but we kept it a secret for a while because we were supposed to announce it when my brother came back from his mission on the 25th of this month. Apparently with your second child you start showing a lot earlier, so we had to say something before people thought I was growing a tumor. Our family is thrilled. The only person that isn't happy about this whole thing is me.
Think of the hardest thing you've had to do in your life. Maybe something that you wouldn't dare do because it's just too difficult. That's how I feel about motherhood. Preparing for med school is a BREEZE compared to being a mother. I don't like being pregnant, but it beats having a newborn in the house. I don't deal well with sleep deprivation. I'm gonna need some Valium once this kid comes.
As far as what happened when I found out... well, I was trying to rule out pregnancy with a pregnancy test so I could call my doctor to test me for hypothyroidism: I was tired, gained weight, and missed my period. Yeah, didn't make that phone call. I FREAKED OUT, and Jacen came in to see what was going on... I kept saying, "Oh no, Jacen, oh no... oh no... oh no...." I waited until Elijah came home from work to tell him. I had Jacen write him a card saying something along the lines of "I'm sure you'll be a great daddy to my little brother and sister". Elijah laughed for a straight ten minutes... apparently he laughed for 2 hours (I had to leave for work).
Some stats: I'm 9 weeks pregnant, due Jan. 12th. So overjoyed by the thought that it's going to be RSV season. *sigh* And school starts, like, on the 10th. Not sure how I'm gonna pull that off, but I've had a kid through finals, so I'll probably figure something out with this one as well. I've been sick like a dog, but nothing that Phenergan can't do. I've been very fatigued (this is a new symptom for me, last time I didn't have this) as well. It just plain sucks.
Not gonna lie: I'm TERRIFIED of having two kids; I'm already overwhelmed with one. Sign me up for a tubal on D-day.

Lord help me.